WIDE OPEN

Staying soft, transparent, and vulnerable.

“Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they’re never weakness.” Brene Brown

“Permit the children to come to Me; do not hinder them; for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.” Mark 10:14

I take such delight in watching soft, quiet, vulnerable creatures. One of the greatest joys I experience these days is being able to just witness the beauty of wild, fragile things and their babies. It’s a side of me I inherited from my sweet mom, and can see so clearly in my own kids—a tenderness toward little defenseless beings.

What has always been more challenging is to embrace the fragility that resides within me. This is why meditation and writing have become such a vital part of my routine. In my own stillness, the parts of me that are much more quiet and vulnerable are allowed to show themselves, and I am able to attentively witness, and take care of them. What I have found is that this is what eases my angst—and lessens my tendency to struggle against life. I’m finally settling in, creating a peaceful home in this body.

So why do we resist this? For me it has been fear— that whatever felt weak or too painful would overwhelm me, and make me unwelcome or unsafe in the world. This was a true story for many of us in our childhoods—and undeniably it’s the ‘reality’ of life in the social media sphere! But the more we can consciously choose to just sit with our own frailty, we tap into an inexplicable encounter with our inner healing. And for those of those of us who pray to God, acknowledging and bringing our whole selves into that Presence, we find a ready well of grace and acceptance that is sometimes difficult to locate within our own psyches.

Lately I have met with waves of insecurity and self-judgment. I’m noticing how vulnerable I feel when I share my thoughts.. even on this platform. While observing all the critters this week—I instantly connected with their skittish vigilance against threats in their environment. In observing their tentative, careful posture, sound, and movement, I felt a compassion for tirelessness of my own anxiety. So this is the message I’m receiving:

May you open wide, even when you fear being judged or misunderstood. When you find yourself searching for a version of you that is more “palatable.”

May you choose to open.. even when you’d rather stay in control.. or when you’re trying to tame a soul that is recklessly transparent. When emotion is not only on your sleeves, but it starts seeping through your pores and won’t be managed through “coping strategies.”

May you be most open..to the heart of you. To what is soft, loving, and unguarded in you. The heart that does not know separation or alienation—that trusts in the kindness of life. Your powerfully gentle heart that so easily invites warmth, compassion, and the fiercest kind of love. The love we usually reserve for defenseless things-like children and baby animals.

Thanks again, dear friends, for reading and listening. If any part of this resonates, let me know in the comments below..